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Sometimes You Get it Wrong

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By: Derek Wellock

When you get it wrong, how hard is it swallow some humble pie and admit it?  It’s pretty hard. A couple of weeks ago I got pulled over for speeding ticket.  The officer came up to the window and asked me if I knew how fast I was going? I said, “49 MPH.”  He said, “Do you know what the speed limit is?’ I said, “less than that I assume”, with a smile, I proceeded to say, “officer, I was speeding, I take full responsibility for that.”  He was very nice and super respectful, I think he genuinely felt bad for giving me a ticket, but I also think I shocked him by taking full responsibility for my error.

How often have you been mad at the officer when you got a ticket?  How often have you owned your mistakes publicly when you realized you made one?  Nowadays people get crucified on social media for mistakes, you literally can’t have an opinion on any social media platform without hate and judgment spewing from the keyboards of someone.  The last presidential election, I became very distressed with social media. I wrote a blog, like this one about how social media can suck the life and productivity out of you. I still think it can if you let it, but it is your choice how you choose to use this powerful too.  It’s not the tools fault, it is your fault for not keeping it in check. Time for me to swallow some humble pie!

As many of you can tell, I have been more active on social media in the past couple of months.  I had to reframe my view of it. This came from a fellow gym owner and mentor having a discussion with me about the importance of community.   With the rapid growth of Double Edge, it has been very difficult for me to grow, build, and maintain relationships with members, I read you can only have 200 meaningful relationships at any given time.  Knowing that there is no way for me to get around to all the classes and actually build meaningful relationships with every member in the gym, not that I don’t want to, but logically it can’t happen. I have been trying, beating myself into the ground the last 6 weeks going to all the classes at both gyms, but it is simply not sustainable for the long term.  So, at the advice of a friend. I want to introduce you to DEcoach_Derek. My new coaching Instagram handle.

To build community, I was missing it by not engaging on social media.  It can be an extremely powerful tool when used correctly. Just in the past 2 months, I have had countless meaningful coaching and mentoring relationships and friendships build purely on social media with current Double Edge Members, that, to be honest, I would have never met otherwise.  It has allowed me a “very uncomfortable” opportunity to show the person I am, and knock down some the misconceptions that others were spreading about me. At the end of the day, I know haters are going to hate. When you are on top, people want to bring you down. I firmly believe Double Edge is one of the best CrossFit Facilities in the country, for sure in Reno.  Not saying others are bad, but this team sets the standard. With that comes a certain level of criticism, but as of late that was mostly directed at me and my brother. Which is fine, I can wear it, but when it started to effect those around me, I had to do something.

So I decided to take who I am as a person, as a coach, as a gym owner and put it all out there for everyone to come to there own educated conclusions on who I am and what Double Edge is.  As I said, haters are going to hate, but now at least I know I am doing my part to be transparent and authentic to all those who wish to know me better. I know I have said many times before, I will respond to your email in great detail, I will buy you coffee to sit down and talk about anything you want.  I am here to serve you, our members, and our Reno community as a whole, but I was still limited on how much I shared unless we truly had a one on one relationship.

Let’s dig into where this comes from.  I am by nature very introverted and shy.  I was homeschooled till the 7th grade, which I truly believe is one of the biggest blessings in my life, as I learned the true value of family.  But on the other side of that, I struggled hard when I went to public school. I struggled to make friends, I struggled to be in public, social settings were very difficult for me.  Going through high school, I had a limited number of friends. Going to college, I had a limited number of friends. And until Double Edge I had a limited number of friends.

My success at my previous job did not come from my ability to talk, it came from my ability to work harder than anyone around me and always do my best work possible.  This attitude carried me through full-time school while working full-time, and it got me to where I am today, and where I am going tomorrow. Call it ego, call it work ethic, call it motivation, I don’t care.  I have come to embrace the person I am and always will be. I work really hard, and I care about others more then I care about myself.

With that mindset, I have had to overcome some of my fears.   When I got into personal training, it was very very difficult.  There were times I was meeting so many new people each week and building relationships around the topic of peoples health.  I genuinely wanted to help people be healthy. It is possibly the most rewarding feeling in the world, but to be able to coach people, I had to get them to trust me.  I had to figure out how to be a people person.

To do this I started paying attention to people who knew how to get people to like them.  Turns outs, I was going through this transformation the same time Barack Obama was running for his first term as president.   There is not a political agenda, so let’s be clear. And if you are wondering, I am a Republican, but let’s leave it at that.  I love to talk politics, but only in person over a good cup of coffee, the way my grandpa did it. Never on social media, or email. So with that said.  Watching George Bush speak was not the greatest thing I have seen, but when Obama came onto the campaign trail and started speaking, he is really good at it.   You can immediately tell the guy knew how to win an audience, I started to respect him as a speaker and paying attention to it. But with anything, it takes practice and training.  So, as I got more clients, I started to get better and coming out of my shell quicker, and building meaningful relationships. These relationships flourished from one on one sessions back in the day, to what you see as Double Edge now.  There is a podcast that breaks down the entire history of Double Edge if you are interested. I have truly learned the power building relationships and how that can truly change the entire direction of your life. It is true, not just what you can do, but it’s who you know, and more importantly, who knows you.  Relationships are a vital key to growth, in any aspect of your life. Human’s are meant to be social and have relationships.

Fast forward to now.   I have struggled to build relationships with our community as the gyms have grown.  But the community is what I love the most about our gyms. Kind of a catch 22. I had to figure it out, with the help of the people around me, I think I am.  

Watching the most recent election, again regardless of your political and personal thoughts.  The election was won on social media. Whether it was manipulated or not, who knows. But at the end of the day, social media hugely impact the entire presidential and congressional elections.  With that knowledge, and the advice of another gym owner. I started to shift my view of social media from a time suck, anger infested shit hole, too maybe this tool can help me get to know and build my Double Edge family.   So I took a serious look at it.

First I had to figure out why I hated.  Well as you might tell, I like the political process.  But I followed all the news channels, from FOX to CNN. Hate and anger filled my news feed from all sides of politics.  It started to affect me so I blamed social media. I had to back away. Now I look at it as a tool to build community, I had to rethink things.  I could no longer blame the tool, I had to take personal responsibility for how I was using the tool.

So I went on an unfollow and unfriend spree, anyone or any company that posted garbage that caused me anxiety, I immediately unfollowed.  It is truly amazing how aggressive people will get on social media, but you get them in person, they completely change their tone, so all those who are platform tuff people are no longer on my feed.  I seriously doubt they care haha. It never affected them, it was only affecting me because I let it. So now that it is cleaned up and I have a focused purpose with the social media platforms, I can start to provide good.

My goal is to be me and share me, the Christain, husband, father, friend, coach, and business owner.  I want those who choose to call Double Edge home, to know me, for who I am, and I want to get to know you for who you are.  I care about all human life and helping all good people become the best version of themselves possible. I want to continue to build community so that your continued success with your health and fitness will continue to be facilitated by the continued success of Double Edge Fitness.  I want to use my platform and share my life events, knowledge and passion with you to inspire you, educate you, and entertain you. I want to help you become the best version of yourself possible. Fitness is my tool to help you become the best in all aspects of your life. The gym is one place I have always come back to, in order to grow, not my body, but my mind and confidence to attack life with purpose.  The gym is one of the greatest tool boxes for personal growth there is. It can’t be cheated, it can’t be faked, it can’t be given. Everything in these walls are earned by grit, blood, sweat, and tears. Talking to you and sharing with you my journey in the gym via social media will hopefully give you the confidence that you can do it too. Whatever your “why” is, I want to help you!

I am not a trust fund kid.  I had a very fortunate life, with the best family there is, but it was and is a humble life.  My hard work and dedication to helping others be successful is the reason I am here and Double Edge is here.    My hard work in the gym with my grandfather from around 4th grade through 12th-grade, year-round, early morning, before the sun came up, built my character and my fortitude to grind, and outwork every single person around me.  Put me a room of fortune 500 CEO’s at some point I will be their boss. Sure there is an ego piece to this, but more important this is a mindset I have developed over years of small successes, big failures, and the willingness to get back up and grind again.   But, my grandpa and my family taught me if you are going to do something, be the best at it, do your best work, Jesus cares about all the things you do, so do it to His glory at all times.

My grandpa is no longer with me.  His death has forever changed me, his life forever shaped me, but today his legacy has lit a fire under my ass that has me running a marathon at a dead sprint to be the best husband, father, friend and business owner I can be.  At this pace I will hit a wall, I will mess up, I will fail many more times before I get to where I am going, but I can tell you with absolute certainty I am going to the top. I am taking all those with me who are willing to put in the work, all those who help those around them be the best versions of themselves possible, those who choose to lead others by serving them.  All those who call Double Edge home and who want to live the best life possible by putting in the work. Those who want it handed to them or given to the will get left behind. The best things in life are the things we earn through blood, sweat, and tears. The work we do in the gym can directly change the outlook and progress of everything in our life.

My social media is now a tool to help you.  And if you want to know me, know Double Edge.  Follow me and engage in conversation with me. I am here to serve you.  Let me know how I can help!